Hide and google
Chris J. Davis and Shawn Grimes among others wrote how people shouldn’t hide behind nicknames and abstract Gravatar icons. I used to have my whole name on my site but I don’t anymore. Why? Because I got scared a couple of times.
In Finland connecting your whole name with your address is very easy, especially when so many people own cell phones (it’s harder to look for me in the phone book — one of few perks of still living at home — but my cell phone is registered under my name). I don’t have the luxury of being “John Smith” (sorry, Mary Smith) in a country of dozens of millions of people. And because of that, some people (who turned out to be weirder than they seemed at first) have let me know that they know exactly where I live. That bugs me, because I definitely don’t want to meet them. Why was I so stupid that I gave too much information for them to do that to begin with? I don’t know. I was naïve.
I don’t keep a blog because I want my whole family reading about me, about my revelations on how I stay up till 6 am writing a big paper — not that it’d be a horrible thing if they knew. Then again, back then when I didn’t have a computer of my own, Dad wouldn’t let me have the power cord for the laptop, because he didn’t want me to stay up too long. I think I sneaked upstairs to get the cord when the battery was low and returned it before anyone woke up (I got up at 6:15 that morning). I don’t like the possibility of someone too close reading something I wouldn’t want them to read. At least I don’t want to make it any easier for them to find me. Maybe I’m just too paranoid; Dr. Phil says that people wouldn’t think so much about what other people think about them if they knew how little others actually do think about them. (Now there’s another tidbit you’d probably be better off without.)
To be honest, I don’t really even know why I keep a blog (or a site, for that matter). I’ve noticed I read my old posts quite often so it’s sort of a diary on what’s been happening (which doesn’t interest anyone else), but I do manage to actually write about some clear topics at times. My other sites (XF, Stephen King, aliens) which I’ve neglected horribly recently function as databases of information for me (how selfish am I?!) and if someone else finds something useful or of interest there, I’m pleased.
OK, back to topic (or at least closer). My Gravatar is from my current layout. It was a hasty solution because I didn’t want to be without a Gravatar on Jafer’s site 
The icon doesn’t have my mug because I don’t think it’s presentable (my favourite coffee mug might be). If my Gravatar were my face, I wouldn’t comment anywhere because I wouldn’t like having to look at it all around!
In addition, I took the Gravatar idea as a representation of my site, not my self. I wouldn’t know what represents the true me (besides that damn mug of mine). Definitely not a bright splash of purple, and a square of black would be too depressing.
At least I use my first name here so I’m not too “bad” a person.
(I set out to write something that makes sense. I’m afraid this doesn’t — much. Maybe you do better.)
You’re making perfect sense, and I agree with what you’re doing.
I made the mistake (didn’t think it was a mistake at the time – I did it all on purpose) of having my name, my pic, everything about me on my old domain. Anybody who knew me could find me and so could all the strangers.
But when work found me I had to take it down – they didn’t want that kind of raunchy, real opinioned writing being found by shareholders.
When I look back to that I’m happy in a way because I don’t really want the people I actually know in person to know half of what I think. If they don’t know me well enough in person to know me, I don’t want them to know me from my blog.
I, too, changed my real gravatar pic to the look of my site layout, since it’s all associated and I think it makes sense.
While I’d like to show the “real” me up there, I can’t do it any more in case I’m found, and if I’m found, chances are I’d be fired.
So I give the real blog me and that makes a helluva lot of sense with all that happens with bloggers these days. I think Chris David and Shawn Grimes are idiots not on a stick – obviously have never faced any threats to (at least) their employment.
My next book will be out in paperback soon
Well, I guess the sharing names depends on the type of blog you keep. CJD and SG write about web design, development, the sort of things they’re maybe dabbling with in “real life” — I don’t know if they write about very personal things at all. Even though I write about “serious stuff”, I don’t want to watch (be careful of) my writing on other topics either.
If I ever become a professional web designer or translator or whatever and start a blog strictly for that topic, I’ll be sure to include my real name and all kinds of info for potential employers.
I think you made perfect sense as well. Shawn and I both dabble in posting personal as well as non-personal content on our sites.
Shawn is much more akin to post personal content than I am, but I still do occasionally. My main point was to stop and think about why you have chosen your gravatar/handle/avatar, and I think you have, obscuring your identity for security sake is a valid reason.
Good to read your thoughts on this. Take care.
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Anonymity on a website is a choice made by users. I have recently read a few posts [Thanks to Minna]on a variety of sites where the push is for […]
You made me think quite a bit about this Minna [I even wrote a post] and one thing that stands out in my mind is the act we are free to do as we please.
Sure, some people think that by splashing their name and photo all over their site, they are free and have nothing to hide. Good luck to them I say.
For many others however, there are a multitude of reasons as to why we ‘choose’ to remain somewhat sheltered by our anonymity.
My first experience with the Internet was through chats and ICQ where naturally I didn’t use my whole name for all to see. And I think of homepaging as a natural “extension” to all that.
There is a site that I’m a webmistress of that has my whole name and that’s just because it’s a potential employer-trap
(I don’t know how “representative” of my abilities it is; it uses Comic Sans which is the last font I would use on a site (right after Times New Roman) but I did what was requested.) Although, I’m afraid only my relatives would hire me — but who knows. This blog of mine has already earned me one job.
Actually, I’m pretty sure I’m being a little too paranoid and having my last name here wouldn’t cause any more people finding this nook of the web than nowadays (my site would be found on the last pages of Google). But, I rather be safe than sorry. I don’t know if I’d want my professors and employers etc. to see that I collect X-Files stuff and aliens…… and drool after David Duchovny.
(Well, to be exact, one of my employers does see this (*waves*) and possibly knows I collect aliens and drool after DD (if they didn’t, they certainly do now), but there’s not really much I can do about it
Besides, they might’ve known it before they “hired” me.)
I guess I see it like this.
I rarely ever walk down the street shouting my name and giving my address to people. Why would I want to do so on the Net?
That’s a good analogy!
If you write something on the net, people will find it. I’ve had new colleagues from overseas offices as well as vendor contacts comment about the writings on my website. In a way, my professional self has hijacked my website.
Because of the recognition, I’m not writing about my thoughts on my site that openly anymore. I mostly stay on technical topics now, with some occasional personal notes about travel or other general (neutral? safe?) subjects. Self-sensorship? I guess…
On the other hand, I also like the idea that if I’m writing something on a mailing list for example, people can use Google for better perspective by reviewing what else I’ve said. Naturally I have an idea of what the picture forming in their heads should look like, and hope that Google’s findings would support it.
So I shout my name on the net. You can even find me on IRC with my full real name. At this point it’s an old habit, but also a conscious policy. It would probably have been better to form the policy first, though, which is where threads like this are hopefully useful to others.
Also, I have to say this: I don’t shout my name on the streets, nor my opinions.
If this site cluster of mine was a little more professional or serious, I might include my full name in it. I might ask people to go see what intelligent thoughts and insights I have.
It’s pretty purple! Serious blogs aren’t pretty purple. (Did you know that according to a study purple-covered horror books sell better?)
Anyway… I’m just a wee defenseless girl (har har) so that’s why I don’t want stalkers or axe murderers come ringing the doorbell. Then again, princes on white horses can’t come either. Bummer.