Many meetings
I have a bad habit of not looking in the eye all the time when talking to people. I don’t know why, but it’s difficult (perhaps because I don’t like someone looking at me in the eye all the time). In the job interview I was in a weird zone or trance and I didn’t 1) freak out, 2) blush, 3) have my heart pounding out of my chest, 4) avoid eye contact. Having met quite a few people today (first day at new job) and I remember there are some stare-avoiders at the department, too, I’ve noticed how annoying that really is.
Also, shaking a limp hand is very freaky — it’s like it would break if I squeezed at all. I managed to get a sound out of one hand today (a man’s, mind you — the Limpy one was a skinny woman) 
Anyway, everyone was really nice and I did notice some of that friendly teasing I was warned about (not directed at me, yet).
You can probably see I haven’t shaken so many hands in my life. A fair amount but not enough to call it a regular thing.
Now I’m pondering whether I can call people by their first name… Maybe I’ll think of sneaky ways around the problem. After all, I just studied veeery boooring stuff on forms of address for an exam.
I have that very same bad habit of not looking people in the eyes all the time. Sometimes I will watch their mouths while they speak so that I don’t have to look into their eyes.
I feel like sometimes when I look into people’s eyes, I can see their thoughts or emotions… whatever’s really behind what they’re saying to me.
That may sound weird, but that’s what it’s like.
Other times I get caught up in looking at their make-up or something which is also not a good thing.
And according to my honey, I have a bad handshake. It’s not limp or soft or too strong, but I don’t have my hand touching theirs where that crevice is; bottom of thumb and index finger joining together, which means I’m a finger shaker according to him – not a handshaker.
Oh no! I watch at make-up too! “Geez, could you have left the mascara out today?” (I don’t like spider lashes)
Heh, finger shaker — Word of the Day
Glad to hear your first day went well Minna
And looking people in the eye – it’s one of those funny things in life isn’t it? I find when I have no respect for a person I can look at them and not flinch an inch, but if I respect the person it can sometimes be a different story.
And you know that feeling when you start to look at them and you say, concentrate on their nose or mouth and then you start to lose all notion of what they are saying – well I do that a lot too…
I’m so glad your first day at work went well
Ah, the eye contact thing – never liked it. But as a respect, I force myself to do it hehe :). Seems like you were very clam =) which is good lol. Hehe – people always tease the newcomers eh? It’s like a tradition or something. Hope your hand didn’t fall off – shaking so many people’s hands today hehee. *I’m going to e-mail you about something – have some things important to tell you* see ya
Ooooh sounds like a good first day.
I can’t look people in the eyes, it embarrasses me and I always feel like I’m staring, but then I force myself to do it anyway as I know a lot of people say it’s very important to look someone in the eye.
I received (actually asked for) a lot of advice (much advice? many advice?) for the interview — my very first — and looking in the eye was one of them. I surprised myself there (at the interview).
Yesterday, when my boss-of-sorts was introducing me to people, he told about them (3 interviewers) asking me about a character in Farsi that always causes grief to computer people and said that I didn’t flinch even at that. Yeah, I didn’t flinch, but I also didn’t know what the character was
It’s ‘yeh‘, and yesterday I studied the issue a little and found out that in Windows 2000 there was an erroneous character — Arabic yeh which has two dots below it in final position — in its place, and the mappings were wrong producing a final yeh instead of a medial.
@Shadow: Wandering mind… a dangerous thing. Occurs often when one should really pay attention.
@Vera: This morning I went to work expecting a prank or something (I was pretty sure they’d arm the security system
Luckily they didn’t). The people who’ve worked together said things like “when I was studying we didn’t have computers”, “oh, in 1800s, was it?”. They haven’t teased me yet (I think… 
).
@Mike: Yeah, it must be the staring thing with me too…
Congrats on having started at the new job, Minna!
I think it is important to look at people in the eyes when you talk to them. I guess it is a sort of sign of respect, although I feel it is also a sign of paying attention and showing that you actually mean what you say.
For example, when I thank someone for their help (e.g. a colleague explaining me something, or the kid selling me a burger at McD) I always make sure I have eye contact to show the other person I’m not just doing it out of habit.
The limp handshake is one of the worst things ever. The real estate broker I’ve been dealing with has one a truly unpleasant handshake (I guess I can’t quite say “disgusting”), and completely surprised me: one would think that in her profession a good handshake would be one of the basic “skills.” She is a pleasant (if over-sweet) person otherwise, but I have no idea how I could tell her about improving that handshake…
Thanks, Kimmo
I’m not used to a normal job (nor normal work hours…), so the first week has been exhausting. Luckily it’ll get “easier” when the lectures start (:shock:).
Yet another good reason to keep eye contact: sign of paying attention. Very true. Today I got a security lecture and I wasn’t allowed to look at the paper
Those people now people too well…